The move is complete, we occupy a new unit and last night I walked through the old unit and it was eerie. As I talked to a fellow employee they compared what remains as a "mass exodus", nurse assignments remain on the marker boards, there are drink cups left behind, drawers are opened (from cleaning out) and it truly did appear that there was a disaster, that everyone and everything that could be grabbed and taken were and everyone ran. The silence is awkward and I looked in every room just making sure no one got left behind. Eerie.
On another dark note, today is the one year anniversary of the death of a co-worker, most of you who still read my blog did not know her. It was one of the hardest shifts of my career, probably will always be one of the hardest. I don't write this for pity or condolences, I did not know her as well as I would have liked, but to arrive at her bedside when her heart stopped and to have the realization that she was not going to survive was a very hard place to be. I have seen many deaths, participated in many codes in my short career, but this code will always occupy my mind and heart. It took me a long time to get passed the day, and I look back today with remembrance of the shift. I remember her today...
3 comments:
Losing a colleague must have been very hard for you Jenn. My thoughts are with you today :)
Thats rough! Both losing your unit and losing a colleague. I didn't know her but knew her story. Thank God I have never had to live that experience. I know I had to code a colleague's dad and didn't know it until he arrived. I cried with him and that was rough.
Wish you only good memories in the new home:) Maybe I'll stop by for a tour!
I haven't been to work since the move yet. Tomorrow is my first shift. I can only imagine the eerie feeling on THEE unit, OUR unit, *sniff, *sniff*. I can't believe it doesn't exist anymore.
And yes, I have been aware of this day and missing Sue. For me it was the loss of a true friend and coworker. I miss chatting with her and occasionally driving her home after work since she lived so close by. I was so glad I was not at work that day or night. I can only imagine how awful it was for all of you there, but I know I felt so much better knowing with out a shadow of a doubt that she had the best nurses and staff there for her to try and do what might be done. Its hard to explain but that brought its own huge sense of peace about it.
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